How not to be a Bridesmaid – 16 Epic Bridesmaid Fails

6 Apr 2016

The Hen Party

1. Broken Leg BEFORE the night out. “How is it possible to break your leg before big night out on the hen party? By stepping on your friend’s burning hot straighteners in the hotel room, stumbling backwards, tripping over your own handbag and landing on a set of high heels which caused you to 1. Look like you’re in a cartoon and 2. Roll your ankle and break your leg in 2 places”. Hospital trip and no hen party: fail.

2. Messing up the ‘Nude Life Drawing’ booking by choosing the wrong model. A muscle-bound, stone-carving of a man can very easily become an old woman with all the saggy bits if you make a mistake! Make sure you book yours through Butlers in the Buff

3. Not sorting out any reservations or entry into any clubs or bars… on a SATURDAY. A group of hens having to walk all around the city in their heels, in the pouring rain does not equal a happy hen party!

4. On a collision course with the groom’s stag party. “The maid of honour booked up all of the hen party herself without any of us knowing where the stags were off to. Both sides were keeping it a secret until after the weekend… Turns out they were off to the EXACT same place as us. Not just the city. But the same club at the same time. Not exactly what anyone wants on the ‘last night of freedom’”.

 

5. Too much for Mum. “We booked a well-hung stripper for the hen party, hoping that everyone would see the fun in it and not be too shocked… including the hen’s Mother who had surely ‘seen it all before’. I think we might have a gone little bit too far with that though. Should have booked a Butler in the Buff.

6. A fail turned into a win. “We were all gathered at the train station to head up to Manchester for the hen weekend… but as you do, drinks on the train turned loud and distracting… so distracting we missed the stop and kept on going up the country and all the way to Glasgow. Massive fail on the face of things but we checked our bags into the lockers at the train station and decided to get on and party all night. It was the best hen party I’ve ever been on!”

7. Don’t drink too much and pull the marquee down…

• “My MOH had so much to drink while we were getting our hair and makeup done that she never made it down the aisle! She slept through the entire ceremony and most of the reception.” — *Rebecca, 30

8. Don’t ruin the brides photos

• Remember it’s not your day!
• It might get boring after smiling until your cheeks hurt for 100’s of photos – but hold the boredom in!
• A few ‘nice’ photo suggestions might be good as the bride might run out of creativity with so many other things on her mind… but make sure they’re actually ‘nice’.

9. Don’t get too excited about the bouquet toss

10. Don’t fall in love with the groom
    1. “My mum’s best friend (and maid of honour) showed up the day of my mum’s first wedding with her head shaved. Apparently she was in love with the groom and this was her silent protest. The marriage only lasted 2 years and the groom eventually married the maid of honour.”
    2. Don’t let the Groom grope you… even if you like it!
11. Don’t argue about the dress / forget about it / wardrobe malfunction

• “At my best friend’s wedding, where I was serving as maid of honour, I bent over and popped the zipper open on my dress just before the ceremony started. Consequently, I had to be sewn back in.” – Morgan Shanahan
• Don’t complain too much about the dress – not liking the colour is not a good excuse, but the price definitely is!
• If you have ideas, suggest them politely and avoid any horrible outfit choices!

12. Remember the photographer will be snapping away – even when you think they’re not…

13. Don’t not do anything
    1. “My maid of honour gleefully said she’d be my MOH when I asked her and then never did another thing after that. I ended up having to cancel my bridal shower because I didn’t have time to plan it myself. I almost cancelled my hen party, but my other ‘maids came together and threw one for me. My husband even picked up my wedding dress for me! While we were having our hair and makeup done on the wedding day, my MOH was off in the corner taking selfies and uploading them to Facebook. She kept making catty comments to one of my other bridesmaids, and we finally had to separate them. Another bridesmaid took her aside and told her she needed to step it up and her response was, ‘I love you, but I want to slap you.’ Needless to say, I didn’t talk to her again after the wedding.” — *Sandra, 35

• Instead, ALWAYS support your bride – no matter what she asks…

 

14. Smile
    1. Enjoy yourself!
    2. Don’t be grumpy (or at least don’t show it!)

15. Don’t plan an awful hen party – Book Butlers in the Buff instead
    

16. Don’t let the bride get too drunk
    1. Long story short, the bride ended up at the altar in a bright purple broken leg cast instead of her designer satin pumps. “Learn from my cousins mistake”, the former bridesmaid advises “and plan the hen party weeks before the wedding”. This gives the bride and her friends plenty of time to recover!

1. Although it’s her day don’t let her dominate the karaoke – she won’t be able to thank-you enough in the morning!

If you were none of the above we salute you! If you were some of the above we salute you!  If you were all of the above we still salute you!  National Bridesmaid Day is to celebrate all Bridesmaids!  No matter how bad… but please, for the bride, try not to be too bad!